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Wednesday Wondering - July 24, 2024

Scripture

Psalm 94:19

When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your comforts delight me.


Matthew 8: 28 - 29

Come to Me, all who are weary and heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.


Reflection

The reading from Matthew was written to those who were feeling overwhelmed and burdened by the rituals required by the temple authorities. Jesus was offering them something that the temple wasn’t, Jesus was offering them peace and God’s love. Using a metaphor that the people would be familiar with, the metaphor of a yoke, Jesus was offering them rest when they were weary and I wonder if he was also offering them the chance to not always be so strong. You see those hearing Jesus’ words would know that a yoke was a way for the ox to share the load, it was also customary to place an experienced animal with a younger, inexperienced animal, and in that way it can slowly, and with less stress, learn how to do what it needed to do. Jesus was offering to the people a way to lighten their burdens, while learning to continue to move forward. Jesus was offering this strength so that those who were burdened did not have to be always be so strong. What does it mean for us to be strong in our world today? I believe that there are those who believe that they always have to be strong, to not be strong will reflect negatively on who they are and how they are living their lives. I wonder about our need to always be strong.


This is a challenging week for me. On July 24, 2013, a Wednesday, I was finishing my last week of my first year at the Atlantic School of Theology. While I was away at school my father was battling terminal cancer. That Wednesday evening I received a phone call from one of my brothers, who called to let me know that my father had taken a turn and the end was near. It was suggested that I do what I could to come home as soon as possible. I switched my flights from Saturday, July 27 to the Thursday, July 25, 2013. Being that it was a Wednesday evening the students had all gathered in the residence’s main floor lounge for Wine Wednesday. It was a time of community, laughter, and wine. I came downstairs to the lounge to let my fellow students know that I was going home early. One of my colleagues came to me, gave a big hug, and said to me, “it is time for you to go home, you have been strong for long enough, now is the time to let go and feel what you need to feel.” To be honest I know that the spectre of death had been over me for that entire time at school. My father had told me to go to school with us both knowing that there was a good possibility that he would pass before I returned. Knowing all of this I didn’t realize that I was being strong while I was away. I couldn’t see myself being strong, but others could see it. I didn’t realize that in being strong I really wasn’t living, it was taking all of my energy to be strong.


I wonder how often in our lives we don’t realize that we have spent too long trying to be strong, strong for ourselves, strong for others around us, just thinking that we must always be strong. I wonder how often when being strong we forget to breathe, we forget to truly live, we allow the stresses of the world to build up in our hearts, our minds, our souls? We have all had to be strong in our lives at different times. We have all gone through times of struggle and strife and if we were not strong, we feel that we might not have made it through those times. But do we have to be so strong all the time? Jesus is offering to us the opportunity to not always be strong. Jesus is saying that it is okay for us to be overwhelmed, for us to be confused, for us to tired. I remember reading a comment on social media that said something along the lines of this, “What doesn’t defeat you makes you stronger, I don’t want to be stronger, I want to be able to cry, to lament, to not always have to be strong.” Jesus is offering to opportunity to not always be so strong. Jesus is offering to us the support and love of God, who is always with us.


I think that when we believe we have to be strong all the time we forget that it is okay to ask for help. We forget that we have a whole community who is there, journeying with us, encouraging us, challenging us, and carrying us when we just can’t be strong anymore. I know that when I was told that I had been strong long enough, it almost felt like I was given permission to not be strong, to not be okay, and in that I was able to begin to grieve my loss. To not be strong, to ask for help, to not have it all together all the time, that is part of being human. So you have been strong long enough, now let each of us be strength for each other.


Prayer

God, of Wisdom and Strength, we ask for the courage to not be strong this day. We ask for the courage to reach out to those around us, those who love us, those who journey with us, and ask for help and strength from them. Help us to be there for those in our lives who are struggling, as we ask them to be there for us. Help us to also see that you are with us, offering that yoke that is light, helping us through the times of struggle and strife in our life. We ask this in the name of one who came to be your light in the world, your son, Jesus. Amen.

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